Pathia Red-Tawner (pathia) wrote,
Pathia Red-Tawner
pathia

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So some stuff happened today.

One for Two is better than Zero for Two.

The good news, well as good as it gets anyway. My brother was utterly unsurprised when I told him I was gay and had a boyfriend. He said he had suspected it from as early as freshman year in highschool. He mentioned my voice was androgynous. He said mom was just in denile if she claimed to have never noticed it before. We laughed a bit at the fact that he has all my 'missing testosterone'. I mentioned my gender dysphoria. This just sort of seemed to confuse him, but he didn't seem angry.

As speculated he changed his view when it was someone close. He quickly amended his previous statements about disliking gays to mean the onces that prance around in pride parades and such. Then he also went on about how 'your hormones are screwed up, so with you it's not a choice'. So, eh, I'll take what I can get.



I called my mom to talk about my visit with my brother, sister-in-law and niece. She was adamant that he would react badly and maybe even assault me over the matter. First she started ranting and raving about me 'telling too many people' so I told her okay, we'll just talk about this after christmas then so there's less drama. We'll, no, she changed her statement to 'I want you to tell no one anything, except me, you can tell me everything'. I continued saying we should wait until after the holidays, we have enough drama already. Oops. That means I have something to tell her, so she poked, prodded and guilt tripped until I spilled to her about my boyfriend.

Dead Silence. Apparently my dad was easedropping on the other phone, so he used this to announce his presence with "I don't approve" and not much else for awhile.

Other statements:
'We're very dissapointed in your choice in this chapter of your life, but we still love you. We do not approve and we do not want to meet him. We hope you will learn to like women' My unspoken though here was...um...learn to like women? I guess he wants me reprogrammed, too bad Exodus won't take me, intersex scares them.

'Doing what makes you happiest doesn't always make you happiest. You need to do something that helps others and improves the life of the...uh...planet'. To this I replied, how would having a boyfriend be any different than having a girlfriend in doing these endevors?
'I guess you have a point, but we still don't approve and never will understand.'

Then they gave me the 'society will be against you' speech.

Maybe society won't accept me, but I still have my friends.



Note: I'm not looking for pity here. Despite the post, I'm doing well. I think my reaction to their...er...reaction speaks to my progress. I'm not having a panic attack, I'm not sick. I'm dissapointed of course, but it's not the end of the world. I can't expect them to accept everything straight out, especially coming from where they are.
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