I'm more or less refusing to go home for the holidays this season due to the fiasco that happened when I went home for Dad's wedding. So far all the conversations have devolved into guilt tripping me and saying I'm selfish. Here are some of the reasons why it's critical that I go home for Christmas. Note: other family members are not getting this guilt tripping, only me.
I don't have kids
I don't have a family here
I'm not 'really married'
It's my fault for moving so far away
It's my fault for being so 'sensitive' to my family's constant political vomitting at the dinner table
So now they've managed to plant a seed of guilt in my stomach. I spend the entire night last night throwing up from the stress. It also proves without a doubt that my relationship is not considered 'real' by my family. It makes me sick, even moreso when it's obvious they don't even realize the harm of this and still don't get it if I explain WHY it hurts.
Why do I let them do this to me?